sitting on the floor, drinking orange juice and watching the cars pass by on the street outside, framed by the leaves of my palm plant, Marley...

talking to my friends lately, noticed that everyone my age seems to be in the same predicament of uncertainty about their futures...i.e., we don't know where the hell we're going in life. everything is so foggy, and though i've laid before myself a path to follow, i have no way of knowing whether it will lead to fulfillment.

at the same time, for the past year or so, i've been finding myself stopping, while i'm sitting outside having a cig with my friends, driving along a long stretch of highway at night--or sitting here in my room, for example--to say to myself, "this is so beautiful," because i know that these are the years i will look back on when i'm older in nostalgia. i guess i'm realizing how good it is to be young, and how fast it's going to pass by.

i'm at a point in life where i'm past the innocence of childhood and the ignorance of adolescence, but still caught in the naivete of youth, yet endowed with enough knowledge to see that i am not yet in, but fast approaching, the steadiness of routine and obligations that may define the rest of my life. not that growing up is a bad thing--we all have to do it at one point or another--just that, well, maybe this uncertainty is good and beautiful in its own way. maybe i'm going to look back twenty years from now and wish that i still felt like i couldn't begin to guess what my life will be like in five years. every day presents itself a new path, and we all should feel lucky to be at a point where everything's so unpredictable.

i want to look back on my twenties and be able to say that i lived them balls out (yes, i know, i do not have balls), no holds barred, to the absolute fullest.

two things i've heard from older, wiser people:
1) if you believe you can or you can't, you're right
2) at the end of it all, you will only regret the things in life that you didn't do.